My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry

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Elsa was born on boxing day. Her story was a Christmas Story. And this tale, "My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry", was also going to be one. ... 'Storytelling is the noblest profession of all. The currency there is imagination; instead of buying something with coins you buy it with a good story. Libraries aren’t known as libraries but as ‘banks’ and every fairy tale is worth a fortune.' That was what grandma believed. Who was Elsa to disagree. "A normal story can either be funny or sad or exciting or scary or dramatic or sentimental, but a Christmas tale has to be all those things. Granny spends time in the hospital, and Elsa overhears a conversation about Granny having cancer. Elsa hardly has time to process the information before Granny dies peacefully in the hospital with Elsa at her side. Over the coming days, Elsa discovers that life is even more difficult without her only friend before learning that she has other friends available. Britt-Marie can’t stand mess. A disorganized cutlery drawer ranks high on her list of unforgivable sins. She is not one to judge others—no matter how ill-mannered, unkempt, or morally suspect they might be. It’s just that sometimes people interpret her helpful suggestions as criticisms, which is certainly not her intention. But hidden inside the socially awkward, fussy busybody is a woman who has more imagination, bigger dreams, and a warmer heart that anyone around her realizes. One morning you wake up with more life behind you than in front of you, not being able to understand how it's happened."

I am not going to say anything else about the plot or the characters as this one is best going in cold if at all possible. I wouldn’t even read the blurb if you haven’t already. Let the story come to you. Props to the artist of the cover and to whoever came up with the title—both are perfect. All passion is childish. It's banal and naive. It's nothing we learn; it's instinctive, and so it overwhelms us. Overturns us. It bears us away in a flood. All other emotions belong to earth, but passion inhabits the universe. Britt-Marie discovers her beloved Kent is having an affair. She simply walks away without a word. She begins looking for a job at the age of sixty-three, with no formal education and no work experience, in an economic down period. Britt-Marie is extremely fastidious and detail-oriented. Social etiquette, organization, and cleanliness are all very important to her, and as a result she becomes privately critical towards others' behaviors. This eventually leads to a rivalry between her and Granny, as well as Ulrika and Elsa. Many people she meets refer to her as a "nag-bag." However, it does prove to come in handy later in life as caretaker of Borg's recreation center.She takes a job in Borg - a village dying with businesses closing up but here ironically, is where her life begins. I want a job because I actually don’t think it’s very edifying to disturb the neighbours with bad smells. I want someone to know I’m here.” But, via a series of apology letters her grandmother wrote to various people she felt she had wronged, Elsa is sent on an adventurous journey that will enlighten her, challenge her perception of her beloved grandmother, and change the dynamics of her relationship with her mother and other family members, opening a door towards forgiveness and acceptance.

For Elsa that is her seventy-seven year old grandmother who regales her with stories that become like a secret communication between them. Her grandmother always comes to defense, is always in her corner, something Elsa desperately needs because she is a little different. This, of course, sets her up for a great deal of bullying at school, and causes her mother a good deal of exasperation at times. It was a community built along the road, and that was the kindest thing one can say about it. There was a closed-down chemist, a closed-down soccer field, a closed-down school, a closed-down health center, a closed-down supermarket, and a road that bears away in two different directions ... Elsa doesn’t know if this means that Granny took all her stories from the real world and placed them in Miamas, or if the stories from Miamas became so real that the creatures came across to the real world. But the Land-of-Almost-Awake and her house are obviously merging." Learning about the people around her and how her grandmother helped them, Elsa’s eyes are opened to knowing that appearances are not always legitimate. She leans to deal with her parent’s divorce and gets friends from school, and the bullying she used to go through stops. She then learns to take responsibility for herself as she receiving Granny’s house. Update this section!

Recent Comments

Which of the characters in My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She’s Sorry surprised you the most? Why? After my dad died -when I was 4yrs old- (her son, Max, was only 34), ...she and I became exceptionally close. She died when I was 7. I may have only had those 3 special years with Granda Cookie.. but they were some of my best childhood memories. Britt-Marie is a character I will remember for a long time to come and am so happy I was able to meet her and experience her awakening and personal growth. I hope we can touch base with her again someday!! Several major themes are touched upon, including: it’s okay to be different; first impressions aren’t always accurate; your elders can teach you a lot; not all dreams should be discounted; young children often have the same fears and insecurities as adults; direct communication and understanding are vital; family does not have to share bloodlines.

For the fastidious Britt-Marie, this new world of noisy children, muddy floors, and a roommate who is a rat (literally), is a hard adjustment. And she finds herself doing things she never would have believed she would do, and befriending and being befriended by people she would never have associated with in the past. And then she has to make a choice.... Creating fairy tale-metaphors for little Elsa, was her grandmother's way of teaching the hard realities of life in story form to the little girl without friends. Nobody understood this bright child, not even the teachers and headmaster at school, where she was constantly bullied. Her busy parents did not know what was happening to her.

Table of Contents

Ah! What have I read here? A delightful take on life? A sensitive take on grief? A wise take on relationships? Perhaps all of it. And more. The story's very ambiguity steadily feeds its mysteriousness and power, and Danielewski's mastery of postmodernist and cinema-derived rhetoric up the ante continuously, and stunningly. One of the most impressive excursions into the supernatural in many a year.