Hurt People Hurt People: Hope and Healing for Yourself and Your Relationships

Product Information

As this process unfolds, we heal ourselves further, and our presence begins to heal others. Our way of being disarms people’s defenses and plants seeds within their minds that will sprout organically into a yearning to investigate their own experience more deeply. Without needing to speak explicitly about our process, we become akin to beacons signaling the truth that a different way of being is possible, magnetizing others who are ready for change. “Therefore the Master The defense of compromise communicates the following: “I will give myself to emotional risk based on the amount of risk you take.” While it seems logical at first, compromise in a relationship is a form of demanding that the other person has to prove herself or himself over and over again, and it is never enough. The other person has the experience of never being able to do enough. “I will give 50% if you will give 50%,” never adds up to 100%. Although that process may work in business, it is destructive to loving relationships. Healthy relationships require that a person be 100% emotionally involved, with the daring hope that the other person will also join. 4. We defend ourselves, finally, through cowardice. Hurt people hurt people. That’s how pain patterns gets passed on, generation after generation after generation. Break the chain today. Meet anger with sympathy, contempt with compassion, cruelty with kindness. Greet grimaces with smiles. Forgive and forget about finding fault. Love is the weapon of the future.” — Yehuda Berg Earlier on Thursday, Geraghty said officers were keeping an open mind in terms of the investigation but were “satisfied there is no terrorist link”.

Likewise, the person closest to you might be the target of your aggression. You could take out all of your frustration on your loved ones simply because of their proximity. 2. A History of Trauma So all the pain, sorrow, rejection, humiliation, shame that we harbor in our hearts will eventually be spoken to someone else. Taking responsibility can be the hardest part. No one likes being wrong. Very few people find pleasure in knowing they are responsible for hurting someone else. Sadly, many people who are carrying hurts are left to deal with their feelings of pain or loss by themselves. When left alone, the hurts that are not healed slowly become a poison that causes a person to become bitter and cynical. The good thing is that our hurts can be healed by Christ's love on the cross.

Hurt people hurt people.

When someone feels overwhelmed by their own inner turmoil, lashing out at others may provide temporary relief from emotional pressure they’re experiencing within themselves. It gives them a momentary respite from their torment even though it’s only s

This is not to say that you were consciously hiding your true self from the people you love. Rather, it takes a certain level of trust to be completely free around people. Whereas you would not hurt strangers, it is easy for you to lash out at your partner or sibling. For instance, if someone is bullied as a child and made to feel powerless, that person might themselves develop bullying tendencies, as a kind of “pre-emptive strike” tactic: That is, the person will subtly bully and assert dominance over those around them to always ensure that they have an upper hand—”I’ll get them before they get me,” the wounded child in the unconscious thinks. When you touch other people, when your words impact them and your actions empower them, your life has both meaning and purpose. — Marisa PeerBest wishes on the winding Path. May you grow with the flow and find countless auspicious blessings and surprises. And have plenty of fun in the process.

Being in a relationship does not mean giving up all your preferences. Wanting independence is not a bad thing; we all need alone time every so often. With proper communication, your partner can understand your needs and give you space without feeling hurt. 9. You’re impulsive In a similar vein, the Tibetain Buddhist teacher Mingyur Rinpoche has said, “If we could see the whole truth of any situation, our only response would be one of compassion.” The part of this incredible promise that feels the most difficult to me comes from my own human struggle with forgiving. How do I forgive someone who has harmed me, particularly if they do not seem at all interested in accountability for that harm? At times it can even feel like I have been harmed and yet the person harming me, or the institutions that shape that harm, appear to have no awareness of the harm at all. How can I forgive that? Nothing and no one is exemptAs human beings, we all face challenging and painful situations at some point in our lives. From heartbreaks to loss, these experiences can be overwhelming and sometimes lead to feelings of anger, resentment or even bitterness. In most cases, hurt people tend to lash out and bring pain upon others, causing more harm than good. Understanding why people hurt others is important to prevent damaging effects on relationships and personal well-being. Below are the top 5 surprising facts you need to know about hurt people hurting others. There can also be a warped sense of ‘justice’ on an unconscious level. A person might consciously wish to avoid reenacting the hurtful behaviors that were inflicted upon them, but unconsciously they might feel resentful and think, “This happened to me, I had to deal with this, so other people should have to deal with this too.” And then without realizing it, they subtly reenact the behaviors they wish to avoid. I have worked with most all of these modalities and found great value in them. I’ve also found tremendous value in simply learning to be the “ witness” of my own mind and my own behaviors. By observing myself non-judgmentally, I’ve been able to bring many of my unconscious patterns into the light of awareness, and I have found that this alone tends to initiate a process of healing unconscious wounds and gradually letting go of behaviors that are not serving me. Awareness is immensely powerful. Healed people heal people.

Yet there does seem to be an upward-spiraling path of human development, and as you progress along this path—as you heal yourself and increase awareness—you increasingly become a healing presence in the world. On a deep, often unconscious level, our top priority becomes avoiding feeling that pain again. This often massively shapes our behavior in ways that are difficult to control.That is why their behavior often seems weird to the others who have never been hurt in such a way. Here are 11 typical behaviors that emotionally hurt people display unknowingly 1. They seek distractions from their painful thoughts You can even look to toddler behavior to see that people often act in thoughtless ways when they feel secure. These people usually don’t make plans for the future, as they are too busy to overanalyze the things that happen to them in the present. They can’t help thinking over and over again about what has happened during the day or the week. They do so because it makes them feel comfortable and distracts them from the emotionally painful thoughts that tend to overwhelm their minds. Sadly, these people tend to overthink all sorts of insignificant details not only the situations from the present moment and very often become obsessed with them. 6. They get upset easily