Eight Dates: Essential Conversations For A Lifetime Of Love

Product Information

The importance of playing and adventuring together and the role of phenylethylamine (PEA) in creating a natural high So, as much as “small words, small gestures, and small acts” matter in a relationship, the plain and simple truth is that relationships are made of date nights. If you do not set aside time once a week to have a planned date night – or date afternoon or morning – with your loved one, then you’re setting yourself for a life of discontent and frustration.

One of the greatest myths about happy relationships is that they don’t experience any conflict. Conflict is going to arise when two people try to join their lives together. Rather than viewing conflict as a negative thing, it can be incredibly useful for you to grow as a couple. For this date, you need to be willing to be brave, take off your armor, and discuss the differences between you. Ultimately, it will help you identify areas of conflict and how to work through them more effectively. More importantly, we realized that we’ll never stop learning about one another, and we look forward to sharing more about our family histories, spiritual beliefs, financial practices, and yes, sexual preferences. There were also not enough varieties of relationships in this book. Everyone had in-laws, everyone had children, everyone went mountain climbing or skiing, and had time for dates. No one had busy, untenable work schedules in this hyper-capitalistic world, no one ate badly or had existential crises, no one stayed in situations that makes them depressed because they had no other choice or believed so. So, get ready to learn which are the eight topics that matter the most in a relationship and prepare to become proficient at “the eight essential conversations that will give you the best chance at creating your own happily ever after.” Love is a never-ending conversation Gottman & Gottman are a husband and wife marriage and divorce counselor pair. They run a prominent marriage institute in Seattle, to which Microsoft provides corporate benefits and many older employees have gone through with delight. They and the co-authors have recorded thousands of couples and claim to be able to predict if a couple will stay together with astonishing accuracy. I don’t believe the actual statistics, but I get the point - they probably know something about what keeps people in love.

12min Tip

Continue by sharing three ways your partners contribute to the relationship (monetary or otherwise) that you really appreciate A good idea for this date is to go to one of your go-to spots or activities, as it represents the time and commitment you’ve made to each other. While the expectations for marriage and partnership have never been higher, and the challenges have never been greater, it isn’t a coin toss. It’s not chance. It’s choice.” I think largely because of my age and COVID-induced introspection, my friends in recent months have turned their focus towards topics like emotional maturity and personal life. Discussions often come to relationships, dating apps, and friends who could pair up. Those in relationships live vicariously through those that are single. In short, I’d recommend this book to any couple looking to take their relationship to the next level. Five enthusiastic stars!

Es wurden zwar immer mal wieder Geschichten von gleichgeschlechtlichen Paaren eingeschoben, aber die meisten Statistiken und Studien bezogen sich auf die Unterschiede zwischen Männern und Frauen und das ganze Buch hat sich sehr heteronormativ angefühlt, teilweise wurde auch sehr in traditionellen Geschlechterrollen gedacht. Sicherlich liegt das auch an der Studienlage, aber ich fand es trotzdem schade. The answers can be found in Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, our latest book with Doug Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD. I used to operate the same way. But my perspective on this changed a few years ago when I interviewed several divorce lawyers about the common reasons couples get divorced, aside from infidelity or money issues.I'm sure there are a lot of similar books around, and while I can't compare this one to them, what I can say is that I loved the concept of these dates. It helped us center our conversations around a particular topic in a particular setting, while letting us apply our own modifications that suited our relationship and our personalities. A holiday is a day that, either by custom or by law, is set aside such that regular activities like going to work or school are suspended, or at least reduced. The term "holiday" can be interpreted differently, depending on the region. In the U.S., paid leave is typically referred to as "vacation," while national, religious, or cultural days off are referred to exclusively as "holiday." In some regions, however, such as the United Kingdom or former British colonies, the term holiday can also refer to paid leave. I doubt your idea of a fun date night is discussing the things you fight about or examining why you’re a saver or a spender. We rarely set aside time in our busy lives to discuss life’s hardest topics.

Contrary to common wisdom, 2 out of 3 couples “have a sharp drop in marital satisfaction shortly after a child is born, and this drop gets deeper with each subsequent child.” To avoid this, fathers need to get more involved, and partners need to discuss the family topic as often as possible. Reserve your fifth date to ask each other the following questions: “What does your ideal family look like?”“If you want children, how many children would you like to have?” and “What are the ways in which your parents did or did not appear to maintain their closeness, love, and romance after having children?” Date No. 6: Play with me – fun and adventure Sex and Intimacy. Romantic, intimate rituals of connection keep a relationship happy and passionate. Couples who talk about sex have more sex, but talking about sex is difficult for the majority of couples—it gets easier and more comfortable the more you do it. Book Genre: Communication, Language, Love, Marriage, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Psychology, Relationships, Romance, Self Help, Unfinished Eight Dates started as a book written by two of the world’s leading marriage researchers, Dr. John and Julie Gottman (and no, their shared last name is not a coincidence). The couple has dedicated their lives to studying love, marriage, and relationships. Having sex and intimacy is proven to help keep a relationship happy and healthy. Talking about sex should be a regular part of your communication as partners. Even if it feels awkward at first, the more you can open up about sex, the better your sex life will be (and it will only become more comfortable the more you do it).

More than 70,000 5-star reviews

Full Book Name: Eight Dates and The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work By John Gottman 2 Books Collection Set Love is an action even more than a feeling. It requires intention and attention, a practice we call attunement.” Navigating the challenges of long-term commitment takes effort—and it just got simpler, with this empowering, step-by-step guide to communicating about the things that matter most to you and your partner. Drawing on forty years of research from their world-famous Love Lab, Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman invite couples on eight fun, easy, and profoundly rewarding dates, each one focused on a make-or-break issue: trust, conflict, sex, money, family, adventure, spirituality, and dreams.

It’s extremely easy for us to be caught up in our adult lives adulting about serious adult matters. What we actually need is to make time for play and fun. To maintain a healthy relationship, couples need to find time for play in their relationship. You also have to respect each other’s sense of adventure, even if it’s different than yours. This date will have you discuss these topics and have a little fun in the process.This book is for any couple: those just starting to date, about to get married, or have been in a 20 year marriage. This book is not just about “testing” your alignment across 8 topics. Great relationships are built - and this book can serve as a guide to long-term relationship satisfaction.