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Add a bit of cheesiness and spice to your conversations with these cheesy dad jokes! 1. My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
My wife and I were out to dinner and the waitress started flirting with me. "She obviously has COVID," my wife said. "Why?" I asked. "Because she has no taste." My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn't working.” I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door and it’s working fine! What’s your name, son?” The principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” “Do you have a stutter?” the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.” If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery…I’ll kill him with my bear hands.If you're feeling depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before you go to sleep. It'll give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning. Audiences for these will have to get specific references to TVs, movies and other newsmakers before these jokes can be deployed, but it's good to have them at the ready.
I asked my date to meet me at the gym but she never showed up. I guess the two of us aren't going to work out. Does anybody know where a guy can find a person to hang out with, talk to, and enjoy spending time with? I'm just asking for a friend. I just found out Albert Einstein existed. My whole life I thought he was a theoretical physicist.A comma. A literalist takes everything literally. A kleptomaniac takes everything, literally. My wife wanted to spice up our sex life, so she asked if we could play doctor tonight. It seemed like a weird idea, but I’m eager to please. This year’s Fibonacci convention is going to be really special. Apparently it’s as big as the last two put together.
I asked my wife if I was the only one she’d been with. She said yes, all the rest had been nines and tens. He must like flying a lot, and he lives in Neverland! 20. Do you know what the loudest pet you can get is? A trum-pet. As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice. My wife gave birth three times and still fits in her prom dress from high school. I gave birth zero times and I don’t fit in my pants from March. If your dad deserves a bit of pampering, this skincare gift set from Kiehl's will hydrate and energise tired-looking skin with a selection of the brand's favourites. Any BBQ king would love to get his hands on this Gentlemen's Hardware Multi-Tool to elevate his grill game. And this personalised wallet is the perfect gift accompaniment.
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