If I Was Your Girl

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We find out that after she became Amanda she attempted to commit suicide and after she began transitioning she was beaten up in a public restroom and her divorced parents decided the best thing to do would be for her to start fresh somewhere where no one knew her as Andrew. It was… really awful to read, and I think it would be even more awful to read for a young trans reader. Russo’s characters are seldom one-dimensional: each has their own issues or struggles, with parents or school or whatnot; and each has their own lines of cleavage. I expected her to be the cool, edgy-but-compassionate artsy friend and the part she ended up playing was way darker and more interesting. To be honest I haven’t read a ton of books with trans main characters, mostly because I’ve focused most of my attention on books by POC, and finding trans POC protagonists is like looking for a needle in a haystack.

On a related note, I'd really recommend reading the authors note in the back as I feel it includes extremely important information for trans folk and cis readers. It's aspects like this that enable you to tell that it's a debut novel, but they are also factors that can be improved with more writing experience and time, so I'm definitely more understanding of these faults. Her parents decide that she should move away from Atlanta to Lambertville, a place where no one will know her history. Something else I appreciated was the ongoing commentary on the ways in which trans people’s struggles are part of a more universal human struggle. MEREDITH RUSSO lives in Brooklyn with her cat Shadow and probably more books than is responsible for a New York apartment.Some of the best villains in literature are the ones who feel that they have been wronged and that their actions are righting that wrong. It also makes sense for the intended young adult readers who are less familiar with these tropes anyway. IF I WAS YOUR GIRL is an intense pressure cooker drama centered on the chaotic affair between two interrelated lesbian couples. And, just when I was getting bored of the romance aspect, the author seemed to know and brought the focus away from Grant for a bit. I imagined how I must look to him, and my mind leaped to fill in all the worst things I had ever felt about myself.

Russo has adapted the trans experience to make it easier for cis readers to digest - again, this is understandable, but sad too. It shows that even the most ignorant or previously prejudiced people can find a tiny shred of compassion. On the more positive side, Amanda’s life isn’t all doom and gloom, the story of the tragic trans person.

That's the story we're used to when it comes to YA novels with a trans protagonist, but If I Was Your Girl, for the most part, tells us Amanda's story after her transition is complete. This starts off as a BIT of a typical YA contemporary with elements that discuss Amanda’s feelings as a trans girl, and weirdly, that’s what I liked about it. Admittedly, they’re a bit stereotypical, but Meredith Russo explains why in her note to readers at the end (so if you’re really curious then I suggest picking it up! In many ways, If I Was Your Girl is very much an issue novel, and I felt like the characters needed room to breathe instead of every single page focusing almost unrelentingly on Amanda’s gender identity.