Not Drinking Tonight: A Guide to Creating a Sober Life You Love

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Not Drinking Tonight | Create A Sober Life You Love What do you do when you realize 1) alcohol is making your life worse and 2) moderating is not working? Being prepared for questions ultimately gives you power over your decision, and minimises any feelings of anxiousness you may be working through. Workshopping a series of short scripts to communicate to friends and strangers that you aren’t drinking could help these questions become a non-issue.

The vignettes with the ‘patients’ were a nice narrative break, but felt out of place. While the rest of the book was very instructional, the fictional scenarios felt forced. I also struggled with the opening of the book, where White works to build rapport with her audience by explaining her own relationship with alcohol. While it’s comforting to know that we’re not being guided by a teetotaler, it was vague enough that it didn’t catch my interest like later sections did. I took my last drink over eight years ago when there was no such thing as sober curiosity. You were either an alcoholic or you weren’t. I didn’t think I was an alcoholic, but I knew I couldn’t continue drinking the way I was either.Help clients pivot away from the question “Am I an alcoholic?” and consider instead “Would my life be better without alcohol?” Heal your relationship with alcohol. Understand how your relationships have been affecting your life, and learn how to set boundaries and create true self care. Whether you have decided not to drinkthat night, or you don’t drink at all, you should feel confident in your decision. There’s no rule that says you have to drink when you go to a party, and chances are you won’t be the only one taking who has decided not to that night. Be comfortable in your decision not to drink, and have confidence going in that you’re still going to enjoy yourself, and you don’t need alcohol for that. Be prepared for questions or comments

Perhaps your confidence and surety in delivering these responses could also inspire someone else. You might find yourself having a conversation with someone who is sober curious and keen to learn from you in making their own changes.Exploring practices from Amanda’s books Not Drinking Tonight, A Guide to Creating A Sober Life and Not Drinking Tonight: The Workbook: A Clinician’s Guide to Helping Clients Examine Their Relationship with Alcohol, we examine how to identify the purpose alcohol serves in your life and how to use this knowledge to recognize patterns of unhealthy behavior, develop boundaries and create a healthier lifestyle. Listen and Learn: It would be great to see you, but I’m having a break from alcohol. How about we meet for a walk / go to a movie / head out for brunch instead?

Mm hmm. Yeah. And I have so many women I work with who stopped drinking and then they’re like it’s this period of like all these are Ha’s and transformations and realization some of which are uncomfortable like, holy shit, I have horrible boundaries, or I don’t like how this person talks to me or I’m really unkind to myself or I’m over scheduled and, and that is difficult and good, because actually yakking at that and making small changes and recalibrations will serve you for the rest of your life.It’s best not to get into the subject too much, but you might find people will ask you why you’re not drinking. Be prepared for this by knowing what you’ll say in response ahead of time. You can keep it simple without going into detail, and it’s best to avoid getting defensive about the topic. Some things you could say if someone asks include: I invited Amanda on the podcast to talk about drinking, not drinking, how to figure out whether your relationship with alcohol is working for you and when to take a break. The Hello Someday Podcast helps busy and successful women build a life they love without alcohol. Host Casey McGuire Davidson, a certified life coach and creator of The 30-Day Guide to Quitting Drinking, brings together her experience of quitting drinking while navigating work and motherhood, along with the voices of experts in personal development, self-care, addiction and recovery and self-improvement.