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I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't): Making the Journey from "What Will People Think?" to "I Am Enough"

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Shame manifests through various symptoms: red face and shaking, difficulty swallowing, and even more extreme ones like the inability to even get out of bed.

I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Four Minute Books I Thought It Was Just Me Summary - Four Minute Books

Top Quote: “Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.” ( Meaning) - I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t) Quotes, Brené Brown What do critics say?The book by Brene Brown raises awareness about the power of vulnerability and how we can explore shame with honesty and vulnerability. The author says that shame hinders our confidence. If we want to change our lives, we first learn to overcome shame. This is what the book teaches us. However, avoiding talking about shame means that not everyone understands what it is. That is what we are here to explain. Part of her work in psychology has been to define what shame is. Brown writes everyone has different triggers based on unique childhood and adult experiences. Therefore, it is impossible to name universal shame triggers which can make it difficult to study shame. At its core, this is a way for people to regain control over their “weak” emotions by showing power.

I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t) - Brené Brown

If you're ashamed of feeling shame or ever wish to have a depth of compassion for others suffering, Brene’ Brown’s I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't) may be the read for you.

Summary Points & Takeaways from I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t)

But all of this - courage, compassion, connection - it's very hard in our anti-vulnerable, I'm better than you, I did everything on my own culture. It doesn't mean the work isn't worth it, though.

I Thought It Was Just Me: Women Reclaiming Power and Co…

We put so much of our time and energy into making sure that we meet everyone’s expectations and into caring about what other people think of us that we are often left feeling angry, resentful, and fearful.” Brené’s first TED Talk – the Power of Vulnerability is the fourth most watched TED talk in the world (although Brené actually hasn’t watched it). We talk about our feelings all the time, yet we know quite little about them. When you say “I’m hungry,” do you know where that hunger comes from? What happens in your body when you feel it? Now, hunger is an easy one, because it’s mostly physical, imagine how complex the situation becomes when you try to understand shame. In her initial research, Brené Brown interviewed over 300 people, after which she arrived at the following definition:The only way to beat shame is having friends and support networks with whom we can share our experiences without being judged. The Role of Anger This book didn't make me feel less alone. It did make me realize, though, that to have true empathy with someone you need to realize you aren't there to fix or better them. You're there to listen, and hear what they are ashamed of, and help them with that. And recognize the same feelings (for whatever reasons you have) in yourself. What followed was a mix of feelings. I was proud of letting go of an outdated rule, while at the same time feeling ashamed for breaking my promise and “being unprofessional.” Blinkist’s summary of Brené Brown‘s I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t)helped me understand myself a bit better. I hope it’ll do the same for you the next time you feel ashamed. Brown, B. (2010). The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are . USA: Hazelden. I wanted to love this book because I love Brene Brown. Her podcast interviews with Tammie Simon and Krista Tippett as well as her TED talks have inspired me, changed me and touched me deeply. I find her to be an incredibly inspiring and courageous woman and I believe her research on Shame and vulnerability and full hearted living are changing and healing the world.

Shame Resilience Theory - Habits for Wellbeing Shame Resilience Theory - Habits for Wellbeing

This book, for me, was like how it is in college when you take your first class in psych and suddenly you see psychosis everywhere. I see shame and shaming everywhere now - in how people comment on the internet, talk about politics, treat kids, work together, tell stories about themselves... It really does pervade everything. And this section put a spotlight on some areas in which I need to work: "Shame often prevents us from presenting our real selves to the people around us--it sabotages our efforts to be authentic. How can we be genuine when we are desperately trying to manage and control how others perceive us? How can we be honest with people about our beliefs and, at the same time, tell them what we think they want to hear? How do we stand up for what we believe in when we are trying to make everyone around us feel comfortable so they won't get angry and put us down?" (p. 242) You can also read the book The Go-Giver Summary. Who would I recommend the I Thought It Was Just Me Summary to? Instead of a synopsis or thinly veiled attempt at sounding studious, I thought I'd extract a few quotes that, while written about and for a female audience, hit home for me and that I think are representative of the importance of the work presented in this volume. Though the things that trigger shame are different for men and women, the feelings are the same. However, there is great relief in understanding the experience is universally experienced (hence, the title).This is what the author refers to as critical awareness. When she spotted her audience falling asleep during a session she delivered, she explained that she knew they only had a short lunch break and that the promised pizza was most people’s main reason for coming in the first place.

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